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Brrrrr.
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Lent. So far, Lent is going swimmingly. I am trying to work on some down-sizing and organizing, in the spirit of simplicity. I also made it to Stations of the Cross last week, and it was awesome.
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Work. Sometimes I hate it when people talk constantly about work or how busy they are. As a friend of mine said, he doesn't want work to be his "life," so he rarely talks about it. To that end, I literally have no idea what he truly does for a living (and we're close friends). However, for something I spend 40 hours per week on, and at least 10-15 hours per week driving to/from, it does tend to occupy a lot of my mind. I read a marriage advice column that suggested you treat your spouse all the time as if he/she is probably having a bad day - with compassion. I am trying to do this with my
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Schindler's List.
I know I'm almost 20 years behind on this one, but my husband and I watched Schindler's List recently as a meditative/Lenten/spiritual movie. I was blown away and moved to tears. I have to say, it has really stuck with me for a few days. I woke up thinking about it several times. It made me want to be a better person. The scene in which Schindler broke down (at the end of the war) and realized that trading in his car could have saved 6 more Jews, that trading in his Nazi lapel pin could have saved 1-2 more...that was haunting. It reminded me of judgment day. Have I done all I can with all that I have? Have I used my resources and money to help others or just for myself? Did I serve Christ in the hungry, naked, homeless, thirsty, helpless? Lord have mercy.
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Misophonia.Doesn't everyone hate eating noises? I have very sensitive hearing. I listen to music at work or put in ear plugs when it gets really loud. I have to change the radio station when I can tell that the host has food or a cough drop in his/her mouth. I just thought I had sensitive hearing, due to my music training and introverted/easily irritated personality. Turns out, there's a name for the raging, homicidal tendencies I feel when I hear certain noises, like my coworker eating lunch 30 feet away or my husband swallowing water. The only way I can describe it is that these noises become so loud to me that they overshadow everything else - conversation, background/white noise, my thoughts - the irritating sound drowns everything else out. Anyway, I still need to practice the virtue of patience and kindness, but there really is something wrong with me! The New York Times says so! Also, St. Therese apparently had the same affliction. Pray for me, St. Therese!
The New York Times wrote about misophonia this week:
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2015/02/23/please-stop-making-that-noise/
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Discernment. This Lent, I've been focusing on the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius. Father Timothy Gallagher has been a really great help in this. He has written tons of books on the mater, and you can find YouTube videos or podcasts from his appearances on EWTN and other interviews he's done.
I've learned - when you first turn to God, the devil will tempt you with what you'll be missing out on, and the Holy Spirit will "prick" you, make you uncomfortable, and lead you to repentence. However, once you're past that stage and trying to grow in holiness, the opposite occurs. At that stage, the devil will try to discourage you, "prick" you with regretful thoughts of the past, and tell you you'll never be what you want to be. Whereas, the Holy Spirit will console you, encourage you, and bring you peace. Such a simple insight, but it really helped me see that what I often thought was "good" guilt or truth, was actually the devil discouraging me.
Reminds me of the quote about, "comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable." Depending on what stage we're in, you have to know which voice to listen to.
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Conversion Story.
I decided to write out my conversion story. I've attempted to do so many times, and I don't know that this is a very good or in-depth version of it, but I wrote a lot of it down in a four-part blog post series. I have been so inspired by hearing the stories of others' conversions (or reversions, etc.) I may go back and add to it and edit over time, but here are the links: part I, part II, part III, and part IV.
Peace be with you.
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